Reporter uncovers Team17 fraud: A victory for investigative journalism

The reputation of the elite media was shattered today as a brave journalist uncovered the truth behind an appalling fraud that left the entire game world dumbfounded. Team17 chief software architect and conservative pundit Martyn Brown, better known by his affectionate alias "Spaedg", had claimed supreme victory over industry leading game developers such as Square Enix, Digital Illusions, Rockstar, Blizzard, Valve, Microsoft Game Studios and Ubisoft Romania, citing a misleading article that listed the most successful studios based on the 2006 retail revenue in the small UK market.

http://www.develop100.com/

It wasn't until comedy journalist and professional Spaedg stalker David B. delved deeper into Team17's literal orifice of depravity that the massive network of lies came to the surface.

http://www.spadget17.blogspot.com/

Using questionable right-wing logic Martyn Brown alleged an utterly unjust distinction for his company, pronouncing it "amongst the top 10 independent studios in the world", a statement that offended several corporations in the actual top 10. Valve Software's morbidly obese game designer Gabe Newell was quoted as saying "LOL GTFO" before consulting his lawyers about legal action against Mr. Spaedg.

While not even industry analysts dare predict the ramifications of this scandal, experts agree that the consequences will be felt for a number of years, rippling through the game industry like a wave of feces through a sewer. Some argue that the art of statementizing and top10making will have to be reconsidered at its fundamental basis.

Team17 is a developer of hat-based games and a leading expert on PC-based hat, moustache and glove simulation technologies. Despite such laughable flops as Phoenix Spaceship Simulator and Stunt GP Toy Car Simulator, the company was generally considered to be successful in the late 90s as a result of its vast Pinball game franchise. The british game studio has recently followed esteemed Daikatana developer John Romero in reimagining its development model for the crappy handheld market.