Hat empire deals crushing blow to freedom of speech

In a cowardly covert operation that took the journalistic community by surprise, the constitutional rights of an entire industry were violated today as right-wing pundit and hat entrepreneur Martyn "Spaedg" Brown inflicted harsh censorship onto fearless journeymen that, prior to this despicable incident, thrived on a freedom of expression that is standard in the civilized western world.

The main event that set in motion a number of violent protests in the middle east was the forceful removal of several comments from Spaedg's infamous press release that wrongfully claimed Team17's superiority over its biggest competitors (as reported here). Not only were David B.s correction and Peter C.s confirmation ruthlessly deleted, the prevalence and independence of investigative journalism itself was put into serious question.

http://spadget17.blogspot.com/2007/04/what-great-way-to-start-new-blog-year.html

Industry analysts agree that this borderline stalinist act will have serious consequences for the failing game studio, further cementing its reputation as a cesspool for the spineless, the paranoid and for those with exceptionally thin skin.

Team17 develops hat-centric entertainment software, lol Stunt GP, lol Phoenix, lol Pinball, etc.

Reporter uncovers Team17 fraud: A victory for investigative journalism

The reputation of the elite media was shattered today as a brave journalist uncovered the truth behind an appalling fraud that left the entire game world dumbfounded. Team17 chief software architect and conservative pundit Martyn Brown, better known by his affectionate alias "Spaedg", had claimed supreme victory over industry leading game developers such as Square Enix, Digital Illusions, Rockstar, Blizzard, Valve, Microsoft Game Studios and Ubisoft Romania, citing a misleading article that listed the most successful studios based on the 2006 retail revenue in the small UK market.

http://www.develop100.com/

It wasn't until comedy journalist and professional Spaedg stalker David B. delved deeper into Team17's literal orifice of depravity that the massive network of lies came to the surface.

http://www.spadget17.blogspot.com/

Using questionable right-wing logic Martyn Brown alleged an utterly unjust distinction for his company, pronouncing it "amongst the top 10 independent studios in the world", a statement that offended several corporations in the actual top 10. Valve Software's morbidly obese game designer Gabe Newell was quoted as saying "LOL GTFO" before consulting his lawyers about legal action against Mr. Spaedg.

While not even industry analysts dare predict the ramifications of this scandal, experts agree that the consequences will be felt for a number of years, rippling through the game industry like a wave of feces through a sewer. Some argue that the art of statementizing and top10making will have to be reconsidered at its fundamental basis.

Team17 is a developer of hat-based games and a leading expert on PC-based hat, moustache and glove simulation technologies. Despite such laughable flops as Phoenix Spaceship Simulator and Stunt GP Toy Car Simulator, the company was generally considered to be successful in the late 90s as a result of its vast Pinball game franchise. The british game studio has recently followed esteemed Daikatana developer John Romero in reimagining its development model for the crappy handheld market.

The war on terror is bad.

I do not like what Mr. Bush has done during his presidency. The war on terror is a waste that took the lives of billions and billions of people. Today I plan on protesting the war on terror by wearing a Che shirt, but for next week I have some special plans up by basement dwelling sleeve: I will camp outside the White House in my orange jump suit in order to raise awareness of the atrocities that are being committed by republicans at Guantanamo Bay. Never forget, never forgive. If we unite enough workers we can overthrow this fascist capitalistic government.

“If it were necessary to give the briefest possible definition of imperialism, we should have to say that imperialism is the monopoly stage of capitalism.”
- Vladimir Lenin

GODSPEED COMRADE LENIN, GODSPEED!